The Year That Was- 2013

It’s been so long since I’ve blogged. Can’t believe 2014 is less than 20 days away. January has always been depressing for me. January brings with it a new year, and an end to the old ways. I guess it’s a Taurean quality, resisting change. January is all about leaving everything behind, and waking up to something new.

But something tells me it’s going to be a good year. 2013 was one of the toughest and most liberating years I have ever had. 2013 made me stronger, happier, and I can see things getting better already.

Here is what 2013 was all about- feelings, opinions, events, the works.

1.       Not all problems are bad. Problems are a way of making you stronger. Always remember- at the end of a hurricane, there is always a rainbow. (P.S.- New found love for "Fireworks")

2.       It’s extremely important to be happy, but it’s equally important to be sad. It’s absolutely okay to have that one moment of weakness, and feel the pain. After 2 hours of crying, you come out as a stronger person. True story.

3.       Loss is not always a negative term (weight loss is good, see :P) On a serious note, loss is a part and parcel of life, it helps you appreciate the simple things. 

4.       There is a wish-list for everyone, but there is a reason God doesn’t grant all of our wishes at the same time. It’s his way of encouraging us to hope for more, and that’s what helps keep the passion alive.

5.       Just because she is pretty does not mean she is easy. Just because she wears short skirts doesn’t mean she doesn’t own a salwaar kameez. She likes meeting friends and having a good time, this does not mean she doesn’t appreciate a healthy and normal lifestyle. So stop judging her so much, let her be. Don’t blame her for being young and beautiful. For all you know, she might be a simple girl who loves coffee more than alcohol; is an intelligent girl, a loyal girlfriend, and is not afraid to speak her mind.

6.       It doesn’t matter what people say, cos people will always be judging you no matter what you do. So be confident and do your thing. Don’t wipe the smile off your face..one day people are going to get bored discussing you. Be patient, and stay true to yourself.

7.       Never regret your past. Everything happened for a reason, and it’s made you who you are today. Learn from your mistakes, and appreciate all that happened. Things change and people move on..don’t disrespect others for “Changing”

8.       Just because you are a girl does not mean your only goal in life is to get married to some rich NRI dude, and show him off to society. So what are you trying to show, that you could get a rich boy to marry you and get you expensive gifts and take you to foreign countries whenever you felt like it? Are you really proud of that? Why can't you be proud of HIM, and not just his money? How is showing off his skill and expertise at a job not something cool? Feminist when it comes to career and job, and a traditional “abla naari” when it comes to affairs of marriage and traditions? Boys want to have fun with all the hot chicks, and then marry someone who will sit at home and make food.  And the girls want to be the talk of the town with all their skimpy outfits and firang boyfriends, and when it comes to marriage they will marry anyone who has money, willing to sacrifice the good old life and get the in-laws to believe what a simple girl she is. Why has love been reduced to something this shallow and cheap?

9.       Be patient, stop nagging. Think things through, take a stand, and be confident about it.

10.   Love is not a Mills and Boons story. A perfect love story is never easy- you need to fight for what you love, and nothing worth having is ever easy.  Be loyal, be strong, be supportive. Leave the ego, it’s a relationship and love is a beautiful feeling. Don’t let ego ruin it.

11.   Don’t get married young. Trust me, you are NOT ready for it. Oh unless he is super rich and well yeah, that.  Cos obviously that’s what life is all about to you- refer point 8.

12.   Did she upset you by showing off her boyfriend and how much he misses her and how he meets her every 2 months and how he buys her expensive branded gifts? I can’t believe that actually upset you, you are stronger than that. Hey but if you are as hot headed as I am (another famous Taurean quality), you are allowed to put her down by showing off YOUR achievements, YOUR money, YOUR job. Be patient, karma never misses out on people.  Since this was about boyfriends, yours is way better than hers, both she and you know that. Why be upset then bro, why?

13.   There will come a point in life when someone else’s happiness matters more than yours. And no matter what, you would never want to hurt him/her. When you feel something that selfless, don’t let go.

14.   If someone asks for your help, and refuses to take your advice, only to come back crying when things go wrong, you have all the right to say- I told you so.

15.   It’s very difficult to be friends with an ex.  Mostly because it takes a long time to get used to the fact that someone might not be the same 3 years down the line. One of you moves on faster, and to a much happier place. So when an ex comes up to you and asks you to stop being judgemental and mean, cut him some slack and explain to him your point of view. If he still doesn’t stop pestering you, you have the right to delete him from your life. Simple.

16.   It’s not always easy to delete someone from your life. But go back in time and see what they put you through- see, it got easier, no?

17.   If you are fat, it’s about losing weight to get healthy. Once you are healthy, it’s all about staying fit.

18.   Love is not the most romantic thing in the world, but no matter how bad things get, love is what will keep us hoping. Passion is under-rated. People take things for granted, which is why sometimes the passion is lost.

19.   Airports are depressing, good-byes are painful. And it’s impossible to forget the last time you hugged him goodbye at the airport.

20.   Nostalgia is not always a sad thing. Nothing cures the "missingness" better than his t-shirt he gave you.

21.    Growing up is painful. It makes me sad to think about those times when I held my father’s hand and walked to school, or when my mother used to make my science projects for me, or how I was the over-protective elder sister to a 6 month old baby…. At the end of the day, your family is the only thing that you have. Respect them, and keep them close.

22.   Being a woman is difficult. Life is not about “screw this shit”, “let’s be wild”, “imma be wasted cos we don’t need men to have fun” and all that. There is a family you have to take care of, there is a reputation to maintain. 24 is not an age to act 18. *Indian Society*

23.    EVERYONE will discuss marriage. You will never be good enough , you will never have what it takes to be in the good books of parents, but if given a chance you need to show people that you mean no harm. Indian society after all. People will judge, and people will disappoint you. People who you thought would stand up for you will NOT, people who were once your friends will judge you, misinterpret your every move, and try to put you down. Just because you will fight for someone does not mean he/she will fight for you. So choose carefully, and stick to your decision.

24.    I gave up drinking, I gave up on a lot of people. Surprisingly it felt relieving, but I still don’t know if people who I did this for realized I did this for them. Anyway, I believe in karma ^_^

25.   Don’t under-estimate the magic that is love. He will not respond to everything that you complain about, he will not compliment you day and night…but he will know when something’s bothering you, and he will help you fight it. Sometimes, he might just know you better than you know yourself.

26.   Passion is important. Passion for travel, for love, for food, for money. A whole lot of passion.

27. The kind of friends you keep says a lot about you. Choose wisely.

28. Don't be under pressure to get married cos everyone else around you is settling down. Or because you feel you are in love. Marriage requires a lot of preparation, and there will be a point when you will be ready to settle down. Wait for it, do not hurry up. When the time is right, it will most definitely be the most beautiful thing in the world.

29. Just because he is the center of your universe does not mean you are the center of his. Deal with it. Someday, your patience and loyalty will be appreciated.

30. Aunties will ask you about your marriage plans, and make a big deal when you say " I have JUST about started working, I need to figure out my income scenes first". It's okay, they are going to shut up soon.

31. Many will give you free advice. You will know whose matters. 

32. There will come a point when you will be fed up of standing up for someone without being asked to. Take a step back, and let them see what they took for granted. 

33. When was the last time you made her feel like she mattered?  Just because she is a sport all the time doesn't mean she doesn't need your compliments. When you are proud to be with someone, let him/her know, that's all. 

34. Never ever underestimate the power of an extremely pissed off woman. 

A whole lot of nostalgia and sadness, but satisfying cos I know I ended this year on a happier note. I was confident, mentally and emotionally stronger, and in love. In the end, it’s all worth it. You need a select few close friends who respect you for who you are. The ones who judge can keep judging, you can either ignore them, or put them down. There are very few in the world who matter, and you will do things to make you happy. As simple as it gets.

It’s been a liberating year, and I can look forward to a happier new year, cos I know it’s gonna be challenging, and that is exactly what I am looking at- challenges. Plus I will be meeting the boyfriend too.  When, we don’t know, but soon.